Hand In Hand

Hand In Hand

Saturday, October 3, 2009

In Limbo

So I'm in limbo right now. I'm just sort of waiting to see what's going to happen this weekend. Today is officially CD 28 and my temps dropped a bit this morning, but not to pre-O temps, not even below my coverline on Fertility Friend. Here is a link to my Chart so that you can check it out. I don't know what the expect. That's where my title for this post comes in. I'm in limbo! 

It's one of those times in life where no matter what result I get this weekend, thigngs are going to change. If I get a BFP, I can cautiously celebrate reaching the goal I've had for two years. But if I get AF, I know that I start my life as the human pincushion (as someone else very descriptively put it). I mean, really, the only good thing is that I wouldn't be one of those old, beat up, raggedy pincushions. I'd consider myself one of those decorative ones you can get an Joann Fabric, you know, the ones that cost more money because they aren't so plain. 

I'm not feeling anything right now. No PMS signs, no anythings. So I don't even know what to expect. I'm not very optimistic, but then again, I have nothing to go on. I've never had a BFP, not even once. I've been content just to know that with the Clomid+Ovidrel, I've been able to O every month instead of taking Provera. But I'm just not very positive or hopeful this cycle. It's not up to me, it's not in my hands, and I know that. But I'm just going to have to wait and see if AF comes to town this cycle or not.

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